i feel maternal towards her

i (peababy) was born on september 22nd. i almost wrote january for some reason. i was not born during the month of january. neither was my sister. i have a twin and i will not mention her for the rest of this carrd.i was born in brazil. i still live in brazil. i love brazil. it is very difficult for me to engage in any sort of small talk without mentioning that i am from brazil at least once. but that's not about my childhood! you're here so i can talk about my childhood.my first fandom was SONIC THE HEDGEHOG, at age FOUR. yes, at four years old i had unrestricted access to the internet. i would, understandably, limit myself to brazilian fansites, which is where i developed unhealthy parasocial relationships with many fan comic writers. one of them was set during the brazilian military dictatorship and it had sonic characters fighting for democracy??? that's how i discovered brazil lived through a US-backed military coup and this is why i hate america.nothing particularly notable happened during my childhood, at least nothing i feel like sharing. so... click one of the other buttons. bye bye!

i DID go to catholic school but i wasn't holy then and i'm not holy now. oh well

one day i joined reddit. my favorite franchise was danganronpa. i was at the lowest point in my life. i don't know how i can live with myself. one day, i was invited to a discord server, by a redditor who seemed like a nice person.you know, that server irreversibly changed me. at first, everyone was WEIRD. not the fun kind of weird (how i imagine i am). it was the weird kind of weird. you had people unironically quoting 13/50. n-bombs flying around. weird and annoying danganronpa discourse about how you shouldn't make fun of characters someone in the server enjoys. it was bad. but i didn't really have anything better to do, so i just stayed there.eventually, all the weirdos either left or got banned. i've censored their names because they annoy me and i don't want them to see this and talk to me, but you know who you are. here's a list of people who pissed me off immensely and i'm glad are far away from my sight:● baseball fan who called antifa and BLM "terrorist organizations", believed in misandry and thought gilette was spearheading a worldwide misandrist campaign
● girl who was part of a throuple which later fell apart and led to her joker era where she unironically quipped "facts don't care about your feelings", came out as an aphobe and put her exes' names as DNIs on her carrd
● canadian nazi sympathizer who thought the kyle rittenhouse trial was really funny. eventually this caused the politics channel in that server to get shut down (because we were rude to him)
● 20-something year old unironic defender of "state-mandated girlfriends". a bunch of 16 year olds bullied him out of the server
● 30 year old with a crippling foot fetish who bravely defended his right to... not use they/them pronouns because... of the dutch language?
● irredeemably reddit-brained trans woman who complains that trans women are too... reddit-brained.
● guy who asked the mods if it was okay to have cum on his anime woman pfp. it was lucia from fire emblem radiant dawn and i still see him on the fire emblem heroes subreddit from time to time
● terminally annoying girl who was later ostracized by the pjsk fandom. i'm not touching that hornet's nest but she deserved the whacking
● guy who could not prevent himself from saying the n-word in every conversation. he was like 13 honestly it's best if i stop talking about him
● "anti-sjw" 30 year old woman who cut a hole in her anime body pillow so she could put a dildo in it. belts exist. girl. GIRL.
● guy who i accidentally bullied off twitter after i said we should kill all men. i don't even feel bad for this one
● israeli guy defending his genocidal government. beefing with him also caused the end of the politics channel in that server mentioned above
● A FELLOW BRAZILIAN who was A RIGHT WING NUTJOB and WANTED TO BE MY FRIEND he stopped talking to me after i said fascism is bad. he was a hardcore jojo fan and i already disliked the franchise but knowing he's still out there makes me want to hate it actively
● guy who left the server after seeing us use the word 'cracker' to attack white people
● girl who dropped the n-word while we were using the word cracker to attack white people. later on we would find out that she was caught jerking off during discord voice chats
● guy with an unhealthy obsession over morgana from persona five to the point where he wished ryuji fans would die. i think about him somewhat frequently because that was really something to behold
● filipino guy who was so interested in waifubot he had a role that prevented him from using waifubot. he loved RWBY and one day he just left and we were all gladif i wanted to start shit I'd add more people to this list, but let's be honest: no one's reading this. if you did, I'm happy for you.anyway, all those people? gone. away from this world. thank GOD. but anyway, with time, this server (known as... Wood Housing) fell apart. people were migrating en masse to a different server (Albania), a different server with like 40% overlap (Trinidad), and some just vanished idk where they are right now. the point is, that server is dead. AND I DON'T LIKE ANY OF THE OTHER ONESi mean, i guess it makes sense. so many years of Wood Housing were just filled with people we hated and who were genuinely irredeemably awful. so, everyone chose to migrate somewhere else. greener pastures!with nothing else to do, i picked up my things and left. life goes on. i was a girlboss, and i had an empire to build.

"what do you mean, 'JUST' a girlboss? have women not learned to not reduce themselves?"

Wood Housing had fallen. Albania had nothing to offer me. neither did Trinidad.
it's been a couple years and they still don't.my first action was to move to Pokémon Showdown. everyone knows what that is. i thankfully secured the username of "a girlboss", and carved my own path playing metagames such as "STABmons" and "Mix and Mega" and "Inheritance", among many others. my natural charisma attracted many fans at this point. i was famous. well, famous is maybe too strong of a word, let's go with... recognizable.and then i stopped playing LOL at some point i just got bored. pokémon started to suck. warping the rules couldn't really save it. i left the stage not with a round of applause, but with overwhelming silence. only a few of my loyal fans still react upon my arrival.around the same time, i went back to reddit. vowing to never touch any anime-adjacent media ever again, i turned to pop stars. this was my first time visiting a circlejerk subreddit, and i got the hang of it pretty quickly. around this time, i spawned some of my greatest hits: taylor swift/scooter braun necrophilia fanfiction, the "outjerked" copypasta, a "choose your own story" adventure where i'm your therapist and you undergo shock therapy, among other quirky/deranged pieces here and there. again, eventually, i lost interest. the subreddit had to be closed down for a month, and so, i was alone again.when it eventually reopened, it was not the same. it was 1989 all over again. you know that book already, i won't bore you with a recap of it, especially because i never read it. but anyway, things were dire. so, i turned to the one media i swore to never touch:comic books.now, i know what you're thinking, this is despicable. i've made a few compromises to shield myself from the sweaty nerds: i would only read X-Men. just X-Men. my journey from 1975 to 2022 lasted six months, where I did nothing but read and read and read. when I was done, it was all I could think about. I'd lost the ability to hold normal conversations. i blame it on the pandemi, but still, it was a problem. to solve this, i joined another discord server, dedicated to an X-Men podcast. the people there were... fine? but something was off. the mods liked me but i could feel the fatigue closing in. 2023 turned out to be a really mixed year for X-Men and i had to clock out. girlbossing had to end.

"you're like the gay porn sommelier" — my best friend

i like gay porn. i very rarely read BL, watch anime or touch fanfiction. gay porn is where it's at for me. you might find it weird that i'm so brazenly putting this out there, but this is the internet so i don't really care. IT'S HOT. SORRY. jesus.uh. i'm doing other things now... besides that. i actually landed a very rewarding job (subreddit moderator) that introduced me to great friends (we don't talk to each other). i had a media thread, but twitter died and it's now lost to time...as of right now, i'm slowly coming back to Inazuma Eleven. i'd watched the anime in its entirety back in 2015 or so and played most of the games, but i couldn't touch the 3DS games... because i don't have a 3DS. i still don't, but my phone is now potent enough to emulate one. also, i watched it subbed because that dub is a crime against humanity and the british need to be hunted for sport.that's... kind of it. i've been downsizing lately and it's probably for the best. it's just... you don't need to be anything. no one really cares. you can just do whatever.
unless you care, in which case... uh... good luck!but yeah, i just search for hot men now. yes, i have standards. if you think you meet them... talk to me and i'll let you know.

"BWWBWOBBBBBB" - pheromosa

(in reality these are just two songs from my 'favorites' playlist)

sources:

thanks for reading! ♥

whaddup i'm jared i'm nineteen and i never f

right. so. there's no other way to say this. since you clicked the "if you're insane" button (or have been driven to insanity) i can only assume you recognize how insane you are. so you forfeit your right to judge me on any of this.i mean... i don't blame you. i don't know how people can put up with me. i got diagnosed for ADD and i just went around telling everyone that i have ADD. so, if you feel like reading through this carrd was an assault on your mental fortitude, i'm genuinely sorry. if you were insane before you clicked this, i'm also sorry, but not as much.anyway, here's my kinlist:

👍

i... well... you see... this page was pretty much blank. i don't like leaving blank pages, and i think my kinlist is pretty self-explanatory in its composition (terrorist, bad bitch, terrorist, literally me, literally me).so... what now?it's not like... there's anything crazier to share? i already said i watch gay porn.maybe you should just leave. think about what you've just read. if you liked what you saw, i don't know, maybe give me a follow? i might follow back. this might scare you away and, you know, that's fine too. it happens!but you will be missing out on my radiant presence if you do that! so maybe don't go ♥

"trans grl pwrrr" no she didn't.

girl i have nothing more to tell you. like. there's... nothing more to say.like, i had this whole paragraph in here and it was the unfunniest thing i've ever written, it reminded me of this girl i stopped following (the aforementioned reddit-brained one) and it causes me mental turmoil to even think about her.look, you should go. when i find the courage to start up my gay porn review blog, you'll find the link right here, on this page. otherwise, just leave.

"There's only two types of people in the world" - Britney Jean Spears

okay since you're new here i should introduce myself maybe idk.hi i'm pea i'm from brazil i'm a STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUAL woman. i'm a fujoshi also. those are like the most important notable things to know about me.i love the x-men i'm incredibly addicted to their existence but this means i don't give a damn about the rest of the marvel universe. or DC. though i heard the joker loves batman (and i've seen it firsthand) which is awesome and i love that for them. before the x-men i don't wanna talk about it. it's a dark period of my life.anyway i also love pop music. i hate some artists and i pretend others don't exist. i'll list some so you know to avoid me, and you can guess which go in which groups:Taylor Swift, Bebe Rexha, any man (NO EXCEPTIONS), Ratmilla Cabello, I know I said "any man" but I'd like to accentuate that I hate Harry Styles, Rita Ora, Halsey, Felony Martinez, THAT rapper who surrounds herself with pdf files, Kim Petras after Dr. Luke collab number 100, the creature known as Doja Cat, Jesy Nelson, Anitta (who?)i think that's it actually i like everyone else to a degreeso after reading all that you can decide if you think you're normal or insane and find out even more about me.... byebye

vem gringaiada! cu e buceta grátis

oi.meu nome é eliza. sou uma MULHER HETEROSEXUAL que curte HOMENS PELUDOS. sim, nós existimos. sonho em ser tirana. se você sabe ler inglês, deve ter lido o resto do carrd. ou talvez você clicou aqui primeiro, eu sei lá. de qualquer forma: tudo o que você leu é verdade. a parte do pornô gay, especialmente. eu amo pornô gay. quis reiterar.sou low profile e provavelmente sempre serei. o instagram é um lugar perverso. eu nem uso aquela merda. uso pra ver o que os outros postam.é difícil decidir o que dizer sobre si. tenho 20 anos. minha cor favorita é salmão, exatamente o tom que você vê ao seu redor, #FA8072. só ouço MPB de música nacional. ouço exclusivamente pop quando o assunto é música internacional. faço aniversário dia 22 de setembro. tenho alergia a frutos do mar. minha cantora nacional favorita é... sei lá, a Adriana Calcanhotto. minha cantora internacional favorita é a Carly Rae Jepsen. não ouço homens cantando, sou fisicamente incapaz... exceto quando são brasileiros e nasceram antes de 2000. meu jogo favorito é Sonic Unleashed, sou fã do Sonic desde criança. tenho TDA. se você quiser puxar papo comigo, mencione X-Men (especialmente os quadrinhos), Sonic, Inazuma Eleven, Fire Emblem (os que eu joguei: 7/8/9/10/13/14/15... e a merda do Heroes), Hitman (exclusivamente o último, não que tenha muito a se comentar) ou algum BL bom. bom mesmo. já me sinto uma fujoshi falsa por ler pouco yaoi. gosto de BL com homens peludos, gordos e/ou calvos.chega, né? pode ir.